So I was at Adobe MAX learning from the master gurus at Adobe about where they hide that button that animates all your scenes for you with perfect believability, and that one button that will do perfect drawings for you, when I was introduced to my first Adobe Evangelist.
I have no idea why they call them evangelists, as it seemed a silly name, but I felt he was probably important so I sketched him down while he was explaining how gamma and chroma points were important to set on your monitor. Unfortunately, there was no tablet.
Only a mouse.
I don't know his name, unfortunately, so he'll just be the evangelist forever more.
And no, I never did find either of those buttons that they were talking about.